Why did my father leave? Why did my mother ignore me? Why did my father violate me? Why did my mother ridicule me? Why? Why? Why? We can get stuck on that question. It’s a common question. But the “why” questions are only the first layer. It’s not the deepest question. The deeper questions expose …
Category Archives: Abuse
Forgiveness, Yes. Trust, No.
Forgiving my father didn’t mean I trusted him. It didn’t mean I let my daughter sit on his lap. It didn’t mean I cuddled with him. Even in his old age, he made sexually inappropriate remarks. Though he was a generous, hardworking, and dependable man in many ways, I never knew what he might do …
“I Forgive”
“Okay, God, I forgive my father.” Sexual abuse at a young age had left serious consequences–anxiety, distrust, debilitating fears, and intrusive memories of the abuse. The abuse had also contributed to severe mental illness. At the time I said those words, I’d just gotten out of the hospital from my second inpatient stay. Diagnosed manic-depressive, I …