The house in Wheaton is still undone. Last year at a conference, I noticed a construction site among the elegant homes, stuck at a half-done stage. I wondered how the neighbors felt. (See June 28, 2006 entry) This year, the chipboard is grayer, the weeds are taller, and the stone on the foundation is still not finished. Now, I’m wondering how the builder feels. Undoubtedly, she did not begin the project expecting it to take more than two years. What’s holding up the process? Lack of funds? Conflicts with the carpenters? Cancer?
We, too, may begin projects that take longer or be harder than we imagine. What we think will be easy turns out to be difficult. How many times have we planned to plant tulips or lose 20 pounds before a birthday or build a playhouse for our child by the summer? Then something interferes.
Some obstacles are out of our control. We don’t choose cancer. We make a plan to pay, but unexpectedly lose our job. We choose workers carefully but run into irresolvable differences. Losing weight requires painful emotional work. The playhouse plans look easy but you almost cut your finger off with the circular saw.
If we shame ourselves—“What’s the matter with you?—we’ll spiral deeper, get more stuck. If we respond with self-compassion—“Poor baby, this will be harder than it looked”—we have a chance of finding solutions.
God is the compassionate and gracious God. (Exodus 34:6) Does he ever say, “What’s the matter with you?” Doesn’t he always say, “Come to me, all who are weary. Let me help you”?
Father, in our stuck places, we need your solutions. Please draw us to yourself.